I'm watching the episode again and vomiting thoughts, for the record.
Also this Bonnie/Stefan team-up is for the win. MY S1 SHIP THAT NEVER FULLY SAILED. You know, for the five seconds it lasted before Damon showed up and then everything was Defan and nothing huuuuuuuurted.
But I am loving that Bonnie's Team Elena always anyway. I doubted her for 1.5 seconds before she came clean about knowing where Stefan was and then I was all WHY DID I EVER DOUBT YOU? And then I was like OH RIGHT because sometimes you talk a lot about putting the needs of the many over the few but haven't gone through with that since season one.
Which is something I've come to love about her, to be honest: Bonnie's too loyal to the people in her heart of hearts to play into her own witchy-nature-balance spiel. (Now watch the show blow that out of the water. They always do that gdi.)
Alaric gets so pissy at the idea that Damon and him are friends again. LOOK DAMON, I'M NOT HERE TO HANG OUT WITH YOU, I'M HERE TO BE A SURROGATE DAD/TEACHER FIGURE THING, IT'S MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU I HATE YOU GO BOTHER SOMEONE ELSE.
Oh, how much these two love each other and how much Ric is not over having a temporary funeral courtesy of Damon's tantrums. I'm pretty sure Damon is about three-years-old emotionally and Ric is maybe ten.
I love that Tyler asks Jeremy if he likes his new daddy Alaric and then tells Jeremy to shoot him because Tyler's new daddy is the same abusive asshole all over again. Oh god your daddy issues, Tyler. Is this a stretch? WHATEVER, TYLER AND THE FATHER FIGURES THAT ABUSE HIM. KLAUS, RICHARD, ETC.
Tyler was phenomenal this episode. He seems utterly unaware of how NOT OKAY all this is, just to keep his own sanity, just so he doesn't have to admit that Klaus didn't save him, he just gave him a different cage. BREAK FREE, TYLER. FLY. He's just the perfect picture of self-imposed ignorance, telling everyone they ~just don't understand~ because he wants to believe that everything is coming up roses for him now.
"THAT SOUNDS LIKE A KLAUS-AND-STEFAN PROBLEM" and a choir of angels sang KLAUS-AND-STEFAN, IT IS KNOWN
So Alaric's officially a Gilbert now, right? From now on he's a Gilbert to me, not a Saltzman. ALSO WHO CHOPS VEGETABLES WITH A MEAT CLEAVER? Sounds like a Gilbert. Okay, more important things:
I just want to squish this funny little family together and make them have normal dinners and play Scrabble and watch Jeopardy on weeknights. I WANT THAT FOR THESE PEOPLE. But the show doesn't and to be honest I also want horrible things to happen to them like death by car and beheading 101 and fun trips to Denver.
"No one's getting out of this town alive." Oh it just calls back to this town is a sickness theme and god, do I agree, Jeremy.
Of course Elena worries about things like school and work. They are normal things that she wants and needs her little brother to worry about. She needs to worry about them. It's as much a coping mechanism as it is about still having control of her life and holding onto whatever normality is left.
Must give credit where credit is due, Elena stands her ground, only bends to find a way to find some power and wield it any way she can.
Ugh I just want to eat the scene up where Stefan is just DO NOT CURR with Elena and then ask for seconds. Stefan Salvatore, you just have hit bottom, haven't you? The only thing you want to care about or just can't help but care about is Damon and revenge now, courtesy of Kathy. JUST HOW I LIKE YOU SO FAR, NGL.
Someone very smart on my flist mentioned everything he feels he's "earned" so far to "deserve" Elena's love has been ripped away by his own actions and it seems unfathomable for him to start. I think that's true, and I'm not sure he even wants to start. He's so lost with this new freedom, but it's not freedom at all. HE'S MADE THIS CAGE FOR HIMSELF.
I think what I love the most about this scene is Elena's okay after it. She's upset, but whatever pain Stefan causes her is not a priority anymore. There are more important things than Stefan, than Damon, than anything and everything else but her family.
Stefan's done awful things and betrayed her, Damon, and everyone (as far as she knows at this point) and he deservedly should be shunned. She was his world, and now she isn't, but he is not hers anymore either.
There's nothing I love more than Damon beating up Stefan proper, CANNOT STOP WILL NOT STOP.
"It doesn't make sense." That's when I truly lost it. You know, in comparison to the first minute of the scene where I was already sobbing ("I don't care about the coffins. We need to talk.")
Damon, you idiot. I LOVE EVERYONE HERE. Of course it makes perfect sense, because there is no Stefan who is good or Stefan who is evil or Stefan who doesn't care when it comes to Damon. THERE'S JUST THE STEFAN WHO NEEDS YOU SO MUCH HE WOULD FORCE YOU TO TURN INTO A VAMPIRE. THERE'S THE STEFAN WHO WOULD SAVE THE MAN WHO RUINED HIS LIFE TO SAVE YOU. And then:
"Stop saving me." BUCKETS OF TEARS
Damon will never understand this because he does nothing to deserve Stefan's love, or anyone's love. He doesn't want the responsibility of being loved like that. STEFAN LOVES DAMON LIKE DAMON LOVES ELENA LIKE ELENA LOVES STEFAN. /hearts in eyes
And then Jeremy, and the blood spattered on his face. It's so grisly and wonderful. There is blood all over the Gilberts in this episode, metaphorically and literally and it's brilliant. He doesn't even hesitate, just sets his jaw and does what he has to. Because he's a Gilbert, dammit. He's his sister's brother. Oh and that terrifies Elena.
That Klaus and Elena seen fills me with rainbows and butterflies. It's just another scene where Elena Gilbert reminds me why she is kind of the best. AND KLAUS' FACE. JUST SHAME AND DESPAIR ALL OVER HIS FACE. I've had this theory the reason Klaus shut all his emotions down was because he killed his mother: not so much that he felt remorse over it, but because he knew his siblings wouldn't forgive him and he needs their allegiance. He needs his family. Because everyone needs their family on this wonderful show.
Back to Elena though: "You can let yourself out." It doesn't matter if she's scared or her world is falling apart anymore. In fact, those things have become the reason she can look Klaus in the eye and tell him where it's at. Although I'm still waiting for her to acknowledge Stefan wasn't just turned into a monster; he's always been one.
He's been trying to build a home for a thousand years. A twisted, fucked up home built on a foundation of lies and murder and blood, but he wanted her to be there for it. Now that's ruined. AND HE'S SORRY. I knew he was going to dagger her again, but it didn't hurt any less when he did.
Klaus can do no wrong in my eyes even when he's doing HORRIBLE, TERRIBLE THINGS. I'm not sure when that happened, my loyalty to ~the winning side. Doesn't make him less horrible or terrible, but he is a wonderful character. Really, really great. He hits on all the things I love and all the things I never knew I loved in a well-rounded Big Bad.
Also he's totally made sweet love to his sister. Every episode makes that more apparent to me. I don't care if Kevin and Julie ever say otherwise, they have boned. Also she is clearly the only woman he has ever loved.
I would have done the same thing.
THEY ARE SUCH IDIOTS AND IT'S BEAUTIFUL.
Damon comforting her in the kitchen, Damon comforting anyone and doing it so sincerely because he's so good at playing parts for her, how distraught she was over death, because she cleaned the blood off the porch and it was on her hands. He helped her get rid of the body guys, that's real friendship.
When they kissed, THE SONG IN THE BACKGROUND. "It's everything you wanted / It's everything you don't." Oh, show. Oh, show.
As usual their kiss is not about committing to each other or anything so romantic and terrifying as that. It's really a beautiful kiss, don't get me wrong. SINCE I LOVE PARALLELS: The porch kiss with Katherine was so sexual and passionate, and the contrast is very telling: this kiss with Elena was about friendship and longing and clinging to each other. WHICH IS WHAT THEY ARE ABOUT. She doesn't pull back and Damon's probably thinking WHAT IS GOING ON, THIS ISN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN LIKE THIS and she reaches to hold his hand and it's-
LOOK. AT. THAT. SMIRK. He is smug and terrified. He leaves Elena standing around wondering what the hell just happened and why did she let it happen because she kind of didn't want it to happen but sort of did. MEANWHILE THEY ARE BOTH IDIOTS.
#they are dancing around their idiocy for each other #from now on what damon and elena have is not love to me #they are just beautiful idiots dancing to their idiocy #the idiotic beauty of clinging to each other in dark places #and loving stefan #and hating stefan #and everything is stefan all the time #except for when they kiss #and then it's about the extent of their idiocy #for loving each other but not wanting to love each other #idiots